Unhealthy Beliefs

 

Beliefs that are unhealthy have, at their core, explicit or implicit, rigid, powerful demands, usually expressed as MUSTs, SHOULDs, HAVE TOs, GOT TOs, e.g. I absolutely must not be rejected. Unhealthy demands are not based on reality.

Rigid demands have three powerful unhealthy derivative beliefs:

1. Awfulising – an unrealistic assessment of badness where negative events are viewed or defined as ‘end of the world bad’ or 100% or more bad.

Example: ‘It would be awful if I’m rejected’, ‘It would be the end of the world if I am rejected and therefore I must not be rejected.’

2. Low Frustration Tolerance (LFT) – the perceived inability to tolerate frustration or difficulty even though we do tolerate it. We do not spontaneously combust and die in the face of frustration and difficulty.

Example: ‘Rejection is unbearable’, ‘I can’t stand it’, ‘It’s intolerable, therefore I must not be rejected.’

3. Total Damning of Self or Other – rating the self, another or the world in a totally negative way, based on a condition.

Example: ‘Rejection proves I’m a failure or worthless or unlovable as a person, therefore I must not be rejected.’

These beliefs are unhealthy because they generate emotional disturbance or unhealthy negative emotions like anxiety and depression. They are unrealistic, do not make sense and are unhelpful to you. They sabotage the achievement of your goals